Tuesday, June 19, 2012

The pooch

So I'm becoming that crazy lady that is obsessed with her doggy..

I used to hate dogs, but I have learned, through various friends, that they aren't all that bad. I actually started liking dogs, and with jake leaving again, we went and got a pooch of our very own to keep me company.

Meet Magnum (Thomas Sullivan Magnum, if he's in trouble). He's the best little guy ever! He is completely potty trained, and not much of a barker, and even asks permission before jumping on your lap! We just adore him! And check out that awesome mustache!!!

Monday, June 18, 2012

Stress

With the date of Jake leaving looming over our heads, I feel extra concerned about every little thing. It's as if the stress in my life has been multiplied by a thousand. This is the opposite of helpful right now. I really would like to enjoy our last few days together. I would really like to spend my time making memories, and enjoying the man I love. Instead, I find myself going over in my mind all the things that could go wrong while he's gone, or all the ways our plans could get messed up, or all the random things that could happen. I know that I am just trying to prepare myself for things to come, but I have no control over those things, and stressing about them doesn't change whether or not they will happen. I just can't stop thinking out all the possible outcomes in things. This is no way to live your life, especially your last moments together. So today I am going to make a conscious effort to stop, to relax, and to enjoy my husband. I have no idea how I am going to do that. This is definitely one of those easier said than done situations, but I am determined to try. Hopefully I can just turn off the stress part of my brain, and learn to relax. Because I just want to relax with the man I love. <3

any tips for learning to stop the stressing would be greatly appreciated!!!

Friday, June 15, 2012

Waiting to say GoodBye

With Jake leaving VERY soon, I decided to start back up in the blogging world... I haven't been good at all  with keeping you guys posted about our lives, and I'm sorry. I will try again, I promise. For those of you who are out of the loop, here is a quick summation of what is going on in our lives currently.

  As most of you know, Jake has been attempting to go from National Guard to Active Duty Army for quite some time now (2 and a half years). When he deployed in 2010 he was told that he would be going active duty when he came back. Well he has been back since September and the process is only now beginning. The Active Duty army is only taking prior service as Special Forces, at the moment. So here is what we are looking at, you can only go through selection if you are an infantry soldier (Jake is a medic). Infantry school is combined with basic training, therefore Jake must go back to basic/AIT, then to airborne, then to special forces selection. This all adds up to a total of 26 weeks (6 months) of separation for us. If, for whatever reason, Jake does not make it through selection, he will be an infantry soldier for 2 years, before he can reclass back to medic. This is not easy for me, but I know he would LOVE being special forces, and I know that God is control. I hate the idea of us being separated yet again, but I know that that's whats best for our family.

   Waiting to say good bye is the worst. knowing that you only have X amount of days left together is haunting. It's like this giant dark cloud in the form of a calendar is following us around in everything we do. Planning everything out is stressful, because when you come down to 2 weeks left everything gets booked up so quickly. You run out of time to do things with all the people you want to make sure he sees before he goes, and more importantly, you've booked up all your time together, for time with other people. Though that makes sense at the time, when it comes down to it, you begin to resent having plans. We are hoping to counteract this by going camping next weekend. Hopefully I will be able to stay positive, and we can just enjoy our time in the woods. I have had a hard time not thinking about how it's June 15th and he is leaving me July 1st. I think I am doing a better job with this, than I did with the impending deployment, because truthfully this is not that bad. However, I am not doing as well as i should be. Hopefully with some more Army Wife practice, I can get better at the time leading up to goodbye. (Or Jake makes it through selection, to Special Forces, and I just have no warning about when he leaves... There are definitely good and bad things in that.)

  Hopefully that caught you guys up on our lives, and gave you a little insight in what's going on in my head with Jake leaving so soon. and with any luck, you guys will hear from me sooner, rather than later. :)